Recently, for the first time in my [almost] 24 years of
living, I watched Disney’s The Hunchback of Notre Dame (note: I’ve never
read the book; this version of the story is the only one I know). I loved it! I
loved so many things about it and could probably go on about it for days. :)
But there’s one thing that I want to write about, and that is the song from the
movie entitled Heaven’s Light/Hellfire.
Here are the lyrics to the Heaven’s Light part:
So many times out
there,
I’ve watched a
happy pair
of lovers walking
in the night.
They had a
kind of glow around them;
it almost looked
like Heaven’s Light.
I knew I’d never
know
that warm and
loving glow,
though I might
wish with all my might.
No face as hideous
as my face
was ever meant for
Heaven’s Light.
But suddenly, an
angel has smiled at me
and kissed my
cheek without a trace of fright.
I dare to dream
that she might even care for me.
And as I ring
these bells tonight,
my cold dark tower
seems so bright!
I swear, it must
be Heaven’s Light!
This song captivates me. Usually, I like translating my
sentiments into words that can be perceived by my audience, then interpreted by
each receiving mind into his or her own thoughts and sentiments, thus,
hopefully connecting our hearts and minds, even if only for a brief moment.
However, I’m finding it very hard to accurately express how I feel about this
song. But here we go:
Layer 1: The words alone carry such an innocent message of
the pure, sweet hope for love that makes your heart fly a little higher. :)
Layer 1.5: “I knew I’d never know that warm and loving glow,
though I might wish with all my might. No face as hideous as my face was ever
meant for Heaven’s Light. But suddenly, an angel has smiled at me and kissed my
cheek without a trace of fright.” You learn more about this character and feel
a small, almost piercing twinge of sadness for him, and that he ever saw
himself in this way. But again, you see that things are looking up for him, and
that makes the flight of your heart a little sweeter. J
A musical side note:
The emotions of this layer and a
half are even reflected in the music. Listening to just the instrumental part,
from 1:19-1:27 it really is sweet and innocent. You have the little
chimes/bells on the top giving the impression of something glittering and twinkling
which, in my opinion, suggest the fantastic innocence and magic of youth; it’s
like we’re being allowed to be dreamers again just for a few seconds (and that
fits perfectly with the line, “I dare to dream that she might even care for
me.”). You also have the flutes with their weightless echo of the theme dancing
over steady, but almost equally weightless tympanic bounds, which make me think
of Quasimodo: a tragic, but powerful creature who usually longs for something
more, but has finally found a reason to look heavenward. :) Then, reflecting
layer 1.5, you have 1:27-1:39; still uplifting, but more substantial,
introducing brass and strings and a lower, more powerful timpani drum line that
still retains its almost weightless, bounding movement. It’s like you’re happy,
but you look a little deeper and now you’re more deeply happy! It’s beautiful.
:)
Layer 2: You learn more about the story, and you realize
that this love that Quasimodo dreams of doesn’t actually play out as he had
hoped. Esmerelda actually ends up with Phoebus. (BUT! The love that she has for
Quasimodo is still sweet, and the love he has for her in return is still pure!
Heaven’s Light is still there, just not as he originally hoped for! For my
heart, I have to add that.) But as you listen to this part, knowing this pure
desire of his heart still doesn’t get realized by the end of the movie and that
he doesn’t actually get the girl, your heart breaks just a little for him. It
kind of puts a hole there. To me, it feels like an opportunity lost, but that
loss is sweetened just a little by the fact that Esmerelda, Phoebus, and
Quasimodo all truly do love each other (in my opinion)… but it’s like…
“ahhhh…….” I don’t really know how to put these sentiments into words, but it’s
kinda like that. It’s among the sweetest stings I’ve ever felt.
Layer 3: K now this layer is more of my personal perspective
on this song. I can kind of relate to Quasimodo. I think, to some extent, a lot
of us might be able to. Personally, it kinda hits home for me because I’ve
never had a relationship pan out. I’ve never even been on a second date. I also
used to have kinda low self-esteem when I was younger, and though I’ve come a
long way with that, I still have my moments where I think to myself something
pretty similar to “I knew I’d never know that warm and loving glow, though I
might wish with all my might. No face as hideous as my face was ever meant for
Heaven’s Light.” There was a time in my life when I thought that might FINALLY
change, and it almost did a few times, but in the end, it wasn’t what I had
originally hoped for. It’s a long and complicated story. But actually, this kid
(and his wife) and I are actually really good friends, and I’m happy with how
things have turned out with him, even though I’m still dreaming about my own
glimpse of Heaven’s Light. …but like, I already feel the light of Christ in my
life through the love and my friends and family, but hopefully you know what
I’m getting at. So underneath the sweet and the sad is a sense of reality for me,
and that gives this song a sweet place in my heart. And that might seem like a
sad thing, but I actually kind of cherish it, because I’ll always and forever
be a starry-eyed [day]dreamer, and I still have that hope that one day,
something will happen for me. :) (Let it be known that the other aspects of my
life are awesome, and I’m living my life to the fullest!)
So that’s a lot of explanation as to why I love this song,
and I haven’t even touched all of it yet! I also love the other half of the
song, not because I fancy perverted old men (GROSS), but because of the dark
melodies (hopefully that doesn’t make me a dark/bad person… I just really love
emotionally-charged things), and mostly because of the great juxtaposition of
light and love that it is! Heaven’s Light vs. Hellfire. Pure, innocent love vs.
ugly, filthy lust. …which is funny, since Frollo’s the one that speaks of
himself as “so much purer than the common, vulgar, weak, licentious
crowd” and Quasimodo is considered the ugly one. Huh.
Anyway, this song is fantastic in all senses of the word.
Also, it’s got that daydream element to it, so it’s perfectly suited for
Daydreams and Fantastic Things. :)
Life
is beautiful. :)
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